Howard Steinmetz, husband of Barbara Steinmetz and father of Julie Shaffer, passed away peacefully at home on Saturday morning, November 27th, 2010.  Howard had fought for every breath of life with determination and strength for many years.  His end was peaceful and loving and his adoring wife Barbara and his two daughters Julie and Monica and their families were there.

The funeral will be Sunday morning, November 28th, 2010 at Congregation Bonai Shalom, 1527 Cherryvale Rd., Boulder, with burial at Crist Mountain View on Kalmia following.

There will be three minyanim for shiva Sunday, Monday and Tuesday nights at 6:30 pm at the Steinmetz home, 2920 Island Drive, 80301. The family may be sitting shiva for most of the week in addition to these times.  Please watch for more information.

If you would like to bring food for the shiva home or meals for the family, please contact Amy Stein at astein@adl.org

Alav hashalom, peace on Howard’s gentle soul and strength and comfort to Barbara and all the family – hamakom y’nachem.

*** The family have requested that we respect their needs as mourners in a traditional way, allowing them to sit and be taken care of in a quiet and appropriate way according to custom. Traditionally, those visiting a house of mourning do not initiate conversation nor create social discourse; rather we offer our presence in a comforting way. For more information, please feel free to ask me or visit this site: Jewish Mourning Customs.

Visiting Mourners

People pay “shivah calls” to fulfill the mitzvah of nihum avelim, comforting the mourners. These visits demonstrate community concern at the time of loss. The visits help the mourners over the feelings of isolation or desertion, both of which are natural feelings after the death of a loved one. Even if many people have gathered, those present should be sure a party-like atmosphere does not develop. Conversation should center on the life and memories of the departed. Contrary to popular belief, talking about the deceased is helpful to the mourner. Such conversations help the mourner to begin the process of getting over their grief. If you have been through a time of personal grief and the mourner asks you how you felt or how you managed, share your own experience. Mourners often take comfort in knowing that others have experienced similar feelings.

Mourners are not obligated to have food or drink available for those who come to visit.