Oh my gawsh. Did you see what Haman was wearing? That long black robe with a pointy hat? What was he thinking? How did King Ahasuerus let him go out like that? I would never let my royal vizier go out looking that way he does. And don’t get me started on Queen Esther. She thinks she is all that, replacing Vashti as Queen. She is Queen alright, queen of GTL, gaudy, lame, and tacky.
Now Mordechai, or as I like to call him, “Mordy Hi,” he is another situation all together. I’d take him to the feast and fist pump with him all night. I love his “I don’t care, but I do” look. It’s like he doesn’t even need to use hair gel. But his tan is perfect. He must work out like every day or something. So modest, standing up for all those Jews like that. I hope he comes to the banquet later.
If any of this made sense to you (or even if it didn’t) and you are a Jew between the ages of 21-45, you should come to the “Persian Shore” Purim Party that Flatiron Tribe is throwing on March 8th at Bacaro. You can find all of the information on our Facebook event page here. There is a link there to purchase tickets. Hope to see you all there!
Sincerely,
A Former Jersian turned Boulderite