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Cultivating Successful Relationships

In this week’s Torah portion we read how Abraham sends his servant Eliezer to the country of Aram Naharayim to find a suitable bride for his son Yitzchok. The Torah tells us that when Eliezer reached the outskirts of the city of Aram, he stopped at the city well, where people from Aram were coming to draw water.  He then, prays and asked G-d to send him the right girl by fulfilling a plan that he devised.  He was going to ask the girl for water and the girl who responds, “Drink and I will even give water for your camels, may that be the suitable bride for Yitzchok”.

The story continues how this occurred with Rebecca and she ultimately became Yitzchok’s wife.

The commentaries explain that the reason that Eliezer tested Rebecca with regard to her kindness was because he felt that that was a most important ingredient to become a part of Abraham’s family.

However, chassidic philosophy explains that there is yet another important lesson to be gleaned from this story which is that the key to finding proper relationships may they be soul mates, friends or  business partners, is by practicing kindness to others.  The reason for this is that when a person practices kindness, he moves from he selfish self to his higher self.  When he is in on this higher stae of mind, he can more successfully connect with other people and create healthy relationships.

About Rabbi Pesach Scheiner

Rabbi Pesach Scheiner is the Rabbi of Boulder County Center for Judaism. In addition, he teaches extensively throughout Boulder County and is the author of “Finding the Joy in Everyday Living,” a book of short chapters explaining the ways to access happiness through appreciation, gratitude, and a sense of purpose.

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