4 Questions for Rabbi Yisroel Bernath

by Celeste Chava Sullivan

We are very excited to welcome an influential teacher of Jewish spirituality, Rabbi Yisroel Bernath—whose book, “The Forgiveness Experiment,” is presently #1 in New Releases in Jewish Theology on Amazon—to lead 3 remarkable experiences on the weekend of February 13-15. We caught up with Rabbi Bernath for a Four Questions interview:

1) Could you share a bit about your own process of forgiveness? When did you realize there was more to this whole “forgiveness thing” than you once thought?

For a long time, I thought forgiveness was something you did for someone else. Noble. Spiritual. Admirable. And honestly… optional.

Then life did what life does, it pressed on old bruises I thought had healed. And I noticed something unsettling: I could be doing all the “right” things… teaching, showing up for people, smiling on the outside, while carrying a tight, quiet anger inside.

That’s when I realized forgiveness wasn’t a moral achievement. It was a survival skill. When I started tugging at that thread, I discovered something uncomfortable and liberating at the same time: forgiveness isn’t about excusing what happened. It’s about noticing how much of me was still living there. My nervous system. My reactions. My story.

Forgiveness, I learned, is not about the past. It’s about reclaiming the present.

2) When did you realize that sharing your ideas and experiences of forgiveness in a book became a non-negotiable?

This was never supposed to be a book. Just notes I wrote for myself and my process. In my work as rabbi, this kept on coming up over and over. I decided to start doing the Jewish forgiveness work in small cohorts called “Forgiveness Labs”.

People kept telling me versions of the same thing:
“I’ve learned Torah my whole life, but no one ever taught me how to forgive.”

Or worse: “I forgive… but my body didn’t get the memo.”
I realized this wasn’t just a teaching, it was a responsibility. A kavanah that wanted to move through me into the world.

The moment it became non-negotiable was when I understood that staying silent would be a form of self-protection, not humility. And that’s not what the soul is here for.

3) What happens when the path in your book becomes a shared experience? Tell us about The Forgiveness Labs.

Something profound shifts when forgiveness moves from concept to community.

The Forgiveness Labs are small, guided groups where people don’t just read about forgiveness, they practice it, together. Slowly. Safely. Honestly.

What changes everything is this: you stop feeling broken for struggling. You realize, “Oh… this is human.”

And once shame leaves the room, healing finally has space to enter. Forgiveness becomes less about fixing yourself and more about befriending yourself. That’s where real transformation happens.

4) Tell us a bit about the upcoming Boulder Shabbaton with Rabbi and Rebbetzin Scheiner—no spoilers though!

I’ll say this much: it won’t feel like a program. It will feel like a pause.

Think deep conversations that linger past Shabbat Kiddush. Think Torah that meets real life where it actually lives in our hearts.

Think Shabbat not as an escape from the world, but as a place where the soul exhales and remembers who it is.

Rabbi and Rebbetzin Scheiner are creating something special, warm, grounded, and deeply human. Come curious. Come tired. Come exactly as you are.

5) If you could convey one message about the power of true forgiveness, what would it be?

Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did was okay.”Forgiveness is saying, “I refuse to let this keep owning me.”

You don’t forgive to close the past. You forgive to open your future. And the greatest surprise of all? When you forgive, not perfectly, not all at once, you don’t just let go of pain. You get yourself back.

Hoping to see you on Friday, Shabbat or Sunday or the whole weekend!

Schedule:

#1 | Friday, February 13, 6:30 pm | Friday Night Dinner + Talk, 5 Things That Improve Every Relationship

#2 | Shabbat, February 14, 10 am | Kabbalah Mindfulness: A Shabbat Morning for the Soul (culminating in a delicious Kiddush)

#3 | Sunday Morning, February 15, 10:30 am | Brunch + Forgiveness & Resilience Panel with Rabbi Yisroel Bernath and Laya Saul.

RSVP: Boulderjudaism.com/shabbaton